School Uniform- the truth at last!

I hated my uniform at Therfield Comprehensive School in the 1970s. 

It was one of the reasons I couldn’t wait to leave. There was a thick blazer with pockets that weren’t deep enough, and a school tie. What idiot invented ties? There was even a school cap that nobody in their right senses would choose to wear- I stopped wearing mine on the first day, after realising I was the only person on the playground with a hat. So when it came to A-levels, I was off down to the road to the local technical college where I could study English, Sociology and Geography with a lot of other non-conformists, and somehow manage to scrape together enough ability to go to Newcastle University, two years later. At Ewell Technical College I was allowed to wear Levi jeans and a Capital Radio T-shirt, and no-one in authority minded or cared. Bliss. Jeans were so magnificently 1970s and rebellious- so we all wore them like a uniform, when we could, as you do, when you’re 16 or 17.

A parable for teachers everywhere... and for anyone else approaching their annual performance review

The Carrots

Douglas was an excellent vegetable gardener. He had been doing it for years, had built up a vast store of experience, and occasionally won prizes when he could be persuaded to enter competitions. But it took quite some persuasion – he honestly wasn’t bothered about comparing his efforts to those of others. He believed that the important thing was to make the best efforts possible in the time available, and grow the best vegetables.

Welcome to the Jedi Faith Academy!

The staffroom was full as the Jedi Master strode in, his long hand-woven white robes gently brushing the floor. All the instructors rose to their feet, their coloured robes denoting their rank and subject specialities.

‘May the Force be with you’ intoned the Master. ‘AND ALSO WITH YOU!’ Having got that out of the way, they sat down to swig some Monday morning coffee and sort out the week.

‘Right then,’ said the Master. ‘Item 1. The light sabres. Again! We’ve had three lost limbs and a very nasty incident in the tuck shop.’ A groan went round the room...