The Dead Weight (Twisted Bible Stories)

Good grief, the man was heavy. Jude shifted the pole onto his other shoulder, but it didn't help. Ezra was a dead weight, and he was going to be heavy even if you split the load amongst four men carrying him on a stretcher. The stony road was digging into the soles of Jude's feet, and he wished he'd brought thicker sandals. How long had they been carrying him? Jude's shoulders ached with the load, and the others weren't finding it any easier. Why hadn't somebody brought a cart - or a donkey, or anything useful? Jude knew why - because Ezra hadn't bought them for the building company.

He glanced back at Ezra, his stupid old head bobbing up and down with the movements of the stretcher. They were carrying him head first, the miserable old whatsit, so he could see where he'd been, but not where he'd be going (That way, he couldn't try telling them where to go). Ezra was a useless works manager. Just because he'd been longest working with the family firm, the bosses had made him manager of the whole house building project. Him! Jude couldn't believe it. Everyone knew Ezra was a thief except the bosses, who'd been fooled well and proper.

The Assassin's Tale (Alternative Bible Stories)

I am going to find him. That little rat Belshazzar has scampered between the shadows of this palace for far too long. But tonight – that idiot Emperor's years of misrule will come to an end. By tomorrow, a new head will wear the Golden Diadem of Power, that of Cyrus the Persian- my employer.

Our preparations have been exacting. His close bodyguards have been threatened, then bribed to look the other way. Of course, they will then be blamed for the assassination, but intelligence and anticipation was never their strong point. The normal palace guards have either been distracted with drink, or sent out on spurious missions to keep them busy elsewhere. Afterwards, it will be blamed on an unfortunate and regrettable breakdown in the Emperor's personal security.

From 3000 years ago... a free gift

There's been far too much news lately- and then along comes the Chilcot enquiry (at last), turning our attention straight back to a string of decisions that took this country into war a few years ago. Iraq was already suffering, but as the man who pulled down Saddam's statue put it,
 '“Saddam is gone, but in his place there are 1,000 Saddams.” 
So yet again, the law of unintended consequences shows what happens when one massive decision goes horribly wrong if there's been no significant plan for working out what to do afterwards.
So... here's a free gift to counter all that News slapping us in the face, with 3000 years-worth of perspective. If you're not familiar with the Bible, don't worry. Just allow these ancient words to wash over you like poetry. Try reading them aloud, perhaps to the background of something playing in the background (Rodrigo's Guitar Concerto, 2nd movement?)